I love reading carefully crafted words which touch me deep where I live? I recently had that joy from an unlikely source:  An email.  But being that the email, and the poem, came from “The Borzoi Reader,” Random House’s online literature publication, I guess it is somewhat understandable.  The poem is about being a woman and coming to middle age.

The name of the poem is “Boat,” and it is by Deborah Digges. I, of course, had to research her a bit and I have all of her books on my wishlist! This is the kind of poet that makes you want to go back to college and pick up another degree – this time in literature.

The poem “Boat,” explores the feelings of facing middle-age with young mothers surrounding, in lines such as,

“Once they looked back to show me myself at fifty, frightening to them, not yet recognizable…”

The last line was, to me, absolutely breaktaking and she observed her 50+ years by considering her, “brilliant, trivial unmooring.”

“Boats” A Poem by Deborah Digges

About Deborah Digges

More Poems from Deborah Digges

Everyone, whoever they are, says that finding your passion is the key to enjoying a fulfilled and peaceful life.  Finding your passion, apparently, can even bring you spiritual fulfillment.  I’ve been mulling that about.  As a widow, a mom, and a full-time writer, I don’t have a lot of spare time.  Finding my passion?  Perhaps I should make my passion sleep!  The reality is that I have to stay organized beyond the capability of a drill sergeant in order to keep my life, and my kid’s lives, going forward, rather than stalling or worse yet, going backwards.

I think, upon mulling this around while I went down and changed the laundry loads around, that passions are perhaps not well defined in our lives.  Passion is NOT the cover of a romance novel; although that wouldn’t hurt every so often.  Passion ARE the driving forces of our lives.

Notice I put that in the plural.  Passions can come in several categories:

• Relationships
• Careers
• Hobbies
• Our Secret Dreams

This all reminds me of what my late husband used to say.  He believed that if you kept your priorities straight, everything in life would just “work out.”  He was right. 

1. He said first you keep your relationship with God right.  Without your belief in whatever you believe in, the foundation is shaky and everything falls apart.
2. The second priority was your marriage.  After your relationship with God, he felt nothing was more important than the love between a husband and wife.
3. Your children.  That pretty much speaks for itself.  If you have children, then they are your passion whether you realize it or not.
4. Careers was his third choice although he vacilated between this one and the next one.  He felt that if you spent so much of your life, as we do at work, and hated it, it would be a miserable experience for everyone.  He was right.  He made a career change because of it and he was a much happier man.
5. Extended family was his fourth choice (or sometimes third – depending on the day).  That would be an adult’s siblings, grandchildren and other family members.  He often saw that people put extended family above their own children and marriage and the results were always disasterous.
6. Hobbies were his final choice and that included what he would have considered his passions.  Whether it is woodworking, auto-racing, gardening… these are last, but they are no less of a passion.

So this is the Floyd-Driven List of Passions and Priorities.  I agree with him.  I like the order and I have seen it in action.  And I try to continue that as my plumb line for living today without him here. 

But I have found another passion.  One perhaps he didn’t think about, or maybe is exclusive to women.  After all men are from Mars…

Your Secret Dreams.  Don’t lump them in with hobbies.  Make them a top priority after the kids go to bed, the hubby is reading or sleeping, the family is quiet… just don’t set them aside.  If you want to write a book, do it.  Get out a notebook or a word processor and do it.  If you want to dance, take a class, or wait for everyone to leave the house and “dance like nobody is watching.”  Or if you want to do what I am doing, learn to play the violin.  I am determined to not die without playing my violin and playing it fairly well.

Either way I win on that one.  I’ll either live forever and have time to do all the other things I want to do, or I will die knowing the violin and I became one and I learned to make it sing.  My Secret Dream.

Adelle Tilton

To me she will always be, at least on the screen, Bob Newhart’s receptionist, secretary, and Girl Friday.  Marica Wallace was one of the best reasons to turn on the original Bob Newhart Show, back in an era when sit-coms actually made you laugh.  But Marcia is much more than that; she is a breast cancer survivor and a woman who redefined herself after being widowed.  She also lives on the stronger side of a nervous breakdown, and knows all about being a “menopausal” mom.  She has conquered a weight problem and a hard childhood.  In short, Marcia Wallace is a survivor, and she is going to be online July 11th to talk about her life.

The Spirited Woman Circle is conducting a series of interviews with women that have brought the best, and worst, of their experiences to bear in creating their lives.  Along with Marcia, over a series of weeks, Rochelle Krich, Fannie Flagg, and The Saucy Sisters will be interviewed through a telephone interview that you can listen in on. 

Rochelle Krich is the author of 14 novels, including Where’s Mommy Now? which was adapted to a television movie, Perfect Alibi.  Fanny Flagg is an actress, author, broadway star… and generally famous redhead.  I especially love her creation, Fried Green Tomatoes – if you haven’t read it, do.  You will love it.  And get the movie too because it is marvelous.  The Saucy Sisters are known for their lectures and books on wine – including, and maybe especially, their newest idea, the wine diet. 

Each of these teleseminars are $15.00 each but if you buy all four, you pay only $55.00.  You can pay with a major credit card or through PayPal so it is accessible to all.  It is a great investment for the woman looking for motivation and hearing about success “against all odds.”  We can succeed if we have the motivation, proper tools, and role models to get us there.  The Spirited Woman has gone out of their way to bring us seminars that will bring much of that valuable information to you.

Spirited Woman Circle Teleseminars

The Spirited Woman

I need an office.  Trying to write, in this atmosphere, is at times a futile gesture.  Insanity rules in a house with teenagers and while I am trying to think deep and important thoughts, I can’t write with a teenager screaming in my ear.  This is especially true when the undercurrents of what is being screamed is, “I need to be grounded because I have an out-of-control smart mouth that is just begging for you to discipline it.”  Get the picture?

I have found my office.  Online no less.  I just have to pony up the bucks (about $150K) and find the trees and its mine… all mine.  I love the whole premise.  It isn’t the Ewok thing.  To me it is more reminiscent of Robin Hood (the movie) and anything that might happen to bring Kevin Costner along is also, very okay. 

I can just picture the inside filled with my teddy bear and doll collection.  I can hear the music I love playing within my spherical dwelling.  I could have a little refrigerator in there filled with my favorite goodies – well, it has to be a freezer because I have to have my ice cream.  With that, in my future sphere, I can write the Great American Novel.

I am just hoping this thing comes with a “NO KIDS ALLOWED” sign!!

Free Spirit Spheres